To Care, or not to Care

Sometimes it hurts more when there is a pretense to care.

When it is revealed the care was not real, there is disillusionment.  If there had been no pretense, there would not have been any expectation.

The elders were careful to side with Tom and against the shepherd  on the prayer chain. The explanation used to to justify the gossip was bearing one another’s burdens.  So Terry is now free to send private prayer requests to whomever she deems appropriate.  If she hears it, the elders have blessed he to share it.

The explanation to justify such a decision is that we are to bear one another’s burdens.  So the elders knew of my grandmother’s death.  (The shepherd had actually sent the information to the elders directly.)  The idea of sharing the burden would make one think the elders will speak words of condolence or something.  I had an email from Terry while I was gone and from June and Rob.  I did not hear a word from Mike, the one pushing this thought through.

My grandmother’s death is not a secret and does not need to be treated as such.  However, don’t tell me you want it on a prayer chain for ministry purposes if you are not going to minister.  Don’t lie to me or yourselves about what the purpose is.  The prayer chain is to make sure the gossip has an easy process by which to spread.

It angers me to have the elders pretend to be about the spiritual and then make such poor decisions.  It would be better to be honest about the lack of concern than to feel good about our concern which is only nosy curiosity.