James Dobson compares conversation to a game of catch. I throw the ball to you and you throw it back to me. If either of us fails to return the ball, the game ends.
However, I think what is more damaging than the fun ending is what is said by not playing. When you don’t participate, you communicate, “I don’t want to play with you. You are not worthy of my time or efforts.”
When I say to my daughter, “I love you,” if she does not acknowledge my gesture, she does communicate. But it is a communication of indifference, or even worse, a rejection. When I share a confidence with a friend, I am telling her, “I trust you with this piece of me. I am trusting you to keep it safe and I am hoping you will make me better for having this piece of me.” If she says nothing, I do not know if she understands that with which I have entrusted her. I begin to doubt – maybe she will not hold it as carefully as I had thought. Without feedback, I do not know.
The sharing of real self requires a response from the hearer. Otherwise it is a one-sided relationship destined to deteriorate.